Wow...did I have to admit to some wrong doing! I know when I go off on a tangent becuz I've lost my ability to reason/hold my opinions to myself that I am going to have to apologize somewhere. And it may not be becuz I think my opinions are WRONG...I apologize for being such a spoiled brat. That is one part of me that I really wish I could erradicate. My feelings get hurt so easily and then I just can't seem to control it. It doesn't matter to me what the other person did to hurt my feelings...what matters to me is how I reacted. I apologize for MY wrong doing.
Now...on to something else...
The one thing I have sought in my life...the one essential ingredient to help me be happy...is CALM. It seems everytime I am about to achieve it, something happens to upset the apple cart. And not a LITTLE something...something all consuming.
Is there such a thing in today's world as CALM?
Talking with someone about God's purpose for our lives...I told that person to be patient...it will come when it is time.
I made the mistake of asking God for 'patience' once. BOY was THAT a mistake! I think He has thrown A LOT of lessons my way. The easier lessons I started to master...then He turned up the difficulty level and I freaked! At one time I thot I found the right rhythm and I was getting a handle on it...but He turned up the difficulty level again. Flat on MY face. It will be a never ending lesson. sigh. And I am beginning to believe I shall never obtain CALM here on earth.
I have also had to accept my place in the general order of things. If I were a pitcher in a baseball game, I would be the one sent in to relieve the starting pitcher...but NOT close the game. It is okay. Just once I'd like to be the closer but...then again...I have never sought a pat on the back or to be the one everyone recognizes as the actual winner of the race. In a 3 person relay race...I am the 2nd position. As long as I know I had a part...as long as I know I did what was asked of me...I will be content with that. It is who I am meant to be.
And now my meandering and jumbled thots will stop. At least on this post.
by PolarB (PM , CC ) on Tuesday April 22, 2008 @ 12:53 PM
Whit: I WISH I could calm down...and nothing seems small to me (except someone under 5 foot tall! joke...lame one). I have ALWAYS let everything get to me...well, except for about a month in 1986.
by Candy (PM , CC ) on Tuesday April 22, 2008 @ 1:37 PM
PB: I used to sit in the corner of the couch in the still of morning...between kids getting off to school and the hubby getting up and making a racket. That is where I did my praying...but most of all, I would wait and listen. And that is where I got my answers. I let life take me away. And I forgot to listen for that still small voice.
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I think He has thrown A LOT of lessons my way. The easier lessons I started to master...then He turned up the difficulty level and I freaked! At one time I thot I found the right rhythm and I was getting a handle on it...but He turned up the difficulty level again. Flat on MY face. 
It will be a never ending lesson. sigh. And I am beginning to believe I shall never obtain CALM here on earth.
Calm down, baby. Life is too short to get excited over the little stuff.
Bear Hugs!
PolarB ;)
Perhaps if I took up Yoga.